More of “What You’ve Learned,” from the readers of Esquire:Dr. John sings about being at the right place at the wrong time, but I would rather be at the wrong place at the right time. -- David Davis, 39, Acworth, Ga.
If at the end of an anecdote you have to say, “It was so funny,” it wasn’t. -- Brian Gotta, 43, San Diego
Step 1: Put keys in pocket. Step 2: Open door to trash chute. Step 3: Drop trash bag down chute. Step 4: Close door to trash chute. Step 5: Remove keys from pocket. -- Christopher Head, 36, Seattle
Dr. Phil is evil. -- Bob Sassone, 42, Gloucester, Mass.
One in a row is a good start. -- Al and Di Waldman, 68 and 60, Malibu, Calif.
Take a different way home every day. -- Larry Menlove, 41, Spring Lake, Utah
As it turned out, Gore wouldn’t have been so bad to have a beer with. -- Barry Friedman, 50, Tulsa
On Sunday night, you should have enough food in the fridge, gas in the car, and dry-cleaned clothes in the closet to last you until Friday. -- Java Coleman, 35, Minneapolis
Argue in court, not on the side of the road with trucks rolling by. -- Lt. George Knowles, 49, Missouri State Highway Patrol
The last wagon of the Mexico City subway is reserved for gay encounters. -- John Morris, 26, Mexico City, Mexico
