Monday, November 24, 2014
Saturday, November 22, 2014
Friday, November 21, 2014
Thursday, November 20, 2014
Well, I guess moving up to the top spot is the Superman onesie I saw last. It’s just my size. It even has a cape. My best performance all year will be acting surprised when you give it to me.
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
Sometimes it’s out of your control, like the Madden Curse. If you appear on the cover of the Madden NFL video game, you’ll suffer some really shitty luck. One quarterback, Daunte Culpepper, set the record for most fumbles in a season before blowing out both knees. He’s fat now.
However, it occurred to me yesterday that if you worked on The Beneficiary, the film that I wrote and starred in, you’ll experience the Beneficiary Bonus. My director, Ted Melfi, just wrote and directed the film St. Vincent. My co-star, Julie Ann Emery, was just cast as a regular on the “Breaking Bad” spinoff “Better Call Saul.” My other co-star, John Kapelos, recurred on “Justified,” and just shot a role in a film opposite Robert DeNiro. Looks like I’m up.
Oh, but one more. My friend John Hunter composed my film, and in 2012, he composed the score for the Oscar-winning animated short. That’s him above, on the right. The other day, I sent a rough-cut of my new comedy short to John, and he liked it so much, he asked if he could score it. Hell yes, sir. Lucky me.
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
And now, it’s a bit less pretty. At a stoplight yesterday in Beverly Hills, I thought I felt/heard a car bump into me. I got out and found out I’d been sideswiped. Waving her hand out her window to me from the turning lane ahead was the culprit: some mom-type who’d tried to cut it way too close.
She didn’t seem very thrilled with herself, so I tried to be super nice about it, letting her know over and over again it was no deal big deal. But it’s actually a major pain in the ass.
And I doubt this was the first time she’d done this, as she went through some pretty choreographed steps, giving me her license and registration, telling me to snap photos of them, and asking me if I could not go through her insurance company. (Extra bonus: her insurance card had an expiration of 2/2/13. She claimed it was paid-up. This dingbat lies about as well as she drives.)