Friday, July 3, 2015

Taking Pics While Driving.

Still legal in all 50 states.

Thursday, July 2, 2015

Guest Cameo.

While coaching my friend Ariel for an audition last night, someone kept trying to upstage him.

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

God Blast The USA.

The TNT stands are back in LA, and I realized: fireworks are the only product about which I find myself saying, “They’re not made in China? Well, I’m not buying THAT crap.”

Tuesday, June 30, 2015


“You sure do know a lot about Pit Bulls.” – the woman on every first date I’ve ever been on.

Yeah, I kinda dig ‘em. Especially one with a really bad wheel. But that leg had surgery performed on it yesterday, and it was a success. Then the fun kicked in. Which included: the vet not telling me I would have to transport Ricky to an all-night hospital so he could have an IV drip all night. And the accompanying cost. (Tack on another 500 bucks to make it an even four grand.) Then I waved off the crazy stretcher they offered and picked up my 76-lb. dog and carried him out to my SUV.

Ricky had been holding in an enormous twosie all day, as they’d neglected to let him outside. It began coming out of him in the back of my SUV, so I pulled an emergency stop and let him finish on some grass. That’s where I took the pic in today’s splash.

Moms and dads, I appreciate the jobs you do and the pressures you face, and I know the needs of a dog are nothing compared to that of a child, but carrying my helpless Pit into the second hospital with his IV and pain meds, watching him confused and unable to sit, knowing all the visits back to the vet and the rehab that lay ahead, and the cost/poop/responsibility was the closest I’ve ever felt to being an overwhelmed single parent.

The vet at the second hospital must have sensed it, and said to me, “Hey – imagine if he tore both knees.” I snapped out of it. Perspective. No charge.

Monday, June 29, 2015

April Fresh.

I haven’t brushed up on my knowledge of semiconductors or reconfigurable engines, but I assume my neighbor putting Mario Kart 7 through the washer and dryer is bad.

Cheering up my neighbor, and the entire neighborhood, really: the sunset last night.

Today is Ricky’s surgery, and this is what the metal piece that will be screwed into his leg looks like. My vet has one of them on his key chain, and it makes me feel better, knowing this is relatively routine. I’ll be bringing Ricky’s shaved butt home later today.

Friday, June 26, 2015

Truth In Signage.

I would describe the cologne on the guy who was on the elevator with me yesterday as “all of it.”

It was easily the most odiferous week of the year. I’ll explain.

Two facts about LA:
  1. There are often bright yellow signs around town that guide cast and crew to movie and TV shoots.
  2. El Segundo, home of the impossibly foul Hyperion Sewage Treatment Plant, is regularly referred to as “Smell Segundo.”
Yesterday, worlds collided when I saw the sign pictured above, on Rosecrans, pointing toward a shoot in El Segundo.

I’m giving my nose the weekend off.