Once Again, Out-Of-Context Thank-You Notes I’ve Recently Written To Casting Directors.

• I’ve made it a rule to never pay retail when buying photos of a celebrity assaulting another celebrity.
• I’ve never taken Viagra, but I once drank a Big Gulp before getting stuck on an elevator. Similar medical risks were involved.
• I’ve cc’d this note to my mom, who incorrectly warned me as a child that water fights would lead to no good.
• I’m so stuck in fast-talking-lobbyist mode that I even wrote this super fast, and got carpal tunnels. Worth it.
• A scene in which I kill my former boss? Somebody’s been reading my diary…