O’Keefe & Merritt Oven. Its broken clock truly is right twice a day. And that slight gas leak lets you know: it’s working. Retail value: probably bought for some wampum.
Laundry Hamper. Exclusively at Target, one of a matching set of 60. Retail value: your pride.
Andiamo Luggage. Toddler’s diarrhea brown. Retail value: free for your Bar Mitzvah.
1996 Nike hiking shoes. Scale the Palisades and still be home in time for tonight's episode of “Webster”. Retail value: the minimum hourly wage of a small, but earnest Indonesian child.
Phone. Slightly smoke-damaged. Retail value: suburban New York home my mother almost burned down.
Raid. Kills roaches and ants, and has a country-fresh scent. It’s a triple threat. Retail value: priceless.
