Breakfast All Day.

Blood is thicker than water. Maple syrup is thicker than blood. So pancakes are more important than family. There, I said it.

My friend TJ would wholeheartedly agree. Wednesday was national pancake day, and TJ, ever so patriotic, had three orders delivered by Uber Eats and went to town. I had a nibble of the chocolate pancakes. He inhaled the rest.

America. F yeah.

Coming Up On “Hucksters”.

I got kicked out of the procrastinators club when I showed up for our first meeting.

Writing is a bitch, but somehow I’ve been plowing through the procrastination to write four new episodes of my sitcom. And tonight, co-star Ben Pace and I are getting together for a two-man table read.

Next week, we’re heading to a party to put the full-court press on an actor to appear on the show. I miss accomplishing nothing already.

End Of An Era.

It’s impossible to ruin something that’s already terrible. It’s like adding more moms to Facebook.

But destroying something great is very doable. “Inside the Actors’ Studio”, the show that inspired my blog, is going through a massive revamp, in which it will move to the Ovation Network and rotate six hosts, with James Lipton “participating in some sort of minor role”. (He’s surprisingly 92 years old. Nice run.)

While I could always do without James fellating guests so much, he does deserve credit for creating and sustaining a really fascinating show. Even civilians found actors chatting about their craft/process undeniably watchable.

I worry now it will just be another interview show that lacks the heft of the original. And try finding the Ovation Network without a map and a mining light.

I’m experiencing all five stages of grief at once right now. Join me.

Lost Shots From The Set.

Whenever I see an empty pizza box in a neighbor’s garbage can, I get jealous that someone had a better night than I did.

And when I see it’s from my favorite pizza place – Mulberry Street – my heart breaks just a little. So imagine how I felt when a prop on my own sitcom shoot was forbidden fruit. Well, forbidden pizza.

It was all a necessary part of a flashback scene, in which I was teased beyond SAG safe workplace standards and not allowed to consume slice after slice. Sure, I threw myself down a flight of stairs, but this was real physical agony. Never again.

Cancelado.

For me, the worst form of punishment is installing Windows 10 on your laptop.

For my nephew, it’s being grounded in his room. (You know you’re a grownup when solitary confinement sounds like a reward, not a punishment.) I believe he earned this for having a meltdown Saturday night, as his mom wanted him to try on some clothes.

I’d promised him I’d help him make churros yesterday, but that was no longer on the schedule after he wigged, and yummy goodness was postponed. Hopefully he’ll have earned some prison yard time by next week.

Quadrupsies.

The one upside to having quadruplets is that you instantly have enough babies to juggle.

I was mesmerized by these four girls at an audition this week, completely identical, super cute, and very tight with each other.

It’s always interesting, this business. I love it.

Breaking Good.

Some people won’t try bacon for religious reasons. I won’t try religion for bacon reasons.

That’s why I wait until my Jews are done with their Yom Kippur fast, and help them break that fast at my friend Marc and Lisa’s house.

Oh yes, there were blintzes – a variety of blintzes. And quiches and bagels, and then dessert was served.

Luckily, this only happens once a year, or else I’d have to contact the DMV about revamping the weight on my license.