Trick Or Cheat.

The scariest Halloween stuff in stores this week is Christmas stuff.

One holiday at a time, please. Let’s enjoy tonight to the fullest, by logging onto Treatster, a new app/website that crowd-sources the best homes for candy in your neighborhood. The full-size Snickers are out there. Make them yours.

They Still Make These?

Well, at least my eight-year-old nephew can use it to see over the steering wheel when I’m too loaded to drive.

Friend In Lowe’s Places.

I’ve taken a drink every time my friend Ariel asked me to blog about his new commercial, and now I’m Amy Winehouse.

But he did ask nicely, so here goes: it’s for Lowe’s. That’s him on the right, playing a professional from the store who’s installed a pedestal sink for a not-so-handy couple.

The spot is running like crazy, especially during the World Series. But not many more times during the series as the Mets are shitting the bed at an alarming rate. Congrats nonetheless, Ariel.

Put It On The Fridge.

If there are peanut butter M&Ms on a desk and I am auditioning for a role, then I am not getting the role.

But it’s good to know that distractions aside, I have a shot. Above is a review from a casting workshop I attended last night, from a casting director for a new drama on FOX. Always good to have a fan.

Don’t Text And Demolish Bus Stops.

But if you must, make sure it’s in front of an auto body place:

We Feed LA.

I love to eat so much, I purposely programmed my iPhone fingerprint ID with my thumb covered in spaghetti sauce.

Many aren’t as lucky as me, and the other day I got to help them a bit by volunteering at the LA Food Bank. We put together buckets filled with food that kids can take home from school every Friday so that their families can eat over the weekend.

When you arrive, the food bank staff assigns you the item you’ll add to the buckets. I was part of quality control, a high-falutin’ name for doing the heavy lifting at the end of the line: weighing the buckets and shrink-wrapping them once we’ve stacked 48 on a pallet. It was a beast, and a back-breaker, but so rewarding I’d love to do it again.

By the way, my friend Alex, who is Mexican, was mildly offended after being assigned beans.

Drive Like A Super Uptight Parent. Got It.