Wednesday, May 3, 2017

Of Course They Did.

The Tyson Zone is a theory created by sportswriter Bill Simmons, in honor of Mike Tyson. When a celebrity’s reputation becomes so bizarre that any story about him is believable, he has entered the “Tyson Zone”. Like if you heard Mike Tyson urinated on a cop, or offered a zoo employee money to box a gorilla, you’d accept each as true.

Mike Tyson actually did offer a zoo employee money to box a gorilla.

And United actually killed and cremated a giant bunny. Are we surprised at all? If you think United mistreats its passengers, imagine being its legal team right now. It sucks to suck.

My only surprise is that we continue to fly this airline. We’re giving them permission to do anything they like. And the crazy-ass shit is getting worse.

I’m flying JetBlue next week, and I have complete faith that I, and my enormous bunny, will arrive in one piece.

No comments: