Thank you for reading my blog. I am appreciate you, and want to give thanks to all the things that made it possible:
- Al Pacino crashing my blog
- Super Bowl Sunday repo man
- The moonset
- Two Jews walking into each other
- Latin George Clooney
- Campbell’s Chunky Hearty Pizza With Sausage & Pepperoni
- Prostitutes in Audis
- Urinals made out of kegs
- Attending three birthday parties on my birthday – none of them mine
- Canned pinot
- Swim trunks featuring my headshot
- The gas meter-reader lady who saw me naked
- A mascot presiding over your wedding
- A Jew walking into a Nazi compound
- The porn going with me
- The Randy Jones half-pound hot dog
- The band God Boner
- The nail-in-a-tire conspiracy
- The dude who dropped the watermelon outside the Food 4 Less
- The Joe’s Barbecue Hogomaniac
- Canned dog-food jelly beans
