My Field Trip To Chicago.

Three hours into this woman not moving an inch, I was convinced her granddaughter was pulling a Weekend at Bernie’s.

In some space-time continuum, a 12-year-old Matthew Shevin got his first boner when I walked past former New York Yankee Dave Winfield at O’Hare.

Which is worse: being killed by a tornado in a men’s bathroom, or surviving a tornado in a men’s bathroom?