AUTOMATED RESPONSE: I Am Currently Out Of The Studio Apartment. Please Do Not Come Looking For Me.

If a white woman goes on a tropical vacation and doesn’t get cornrows, did the trip even happen?

I’m not sure I’ll be qualified to answer this question, seeing as I’m heading to Costa Rica tonight with 14 dudes. It’s a bachelor party, and I’ll be gone through Sunday.

The over/under on how many guys make it back is 11. Take the under.