Once Again, Out-Of-Context Thank-You Notes I’ve Recently Written To Casting Directors.

• I am with you on water parks. They are a cesspool of disease and people boo you when you walk back down the stairs.

• I confess that “turning circle” is about item zillion on my list of car-buying priorities.

• At this point, what is the difference between an Albertsons and a homeless shelter?

• I’m remaking Warrants “Cherry Pie” video and need a harness, a hair dryer, ten tons of cocaine, no harness and no hair dryer.

• Oops – I realized I gave you my Gmail address and not Yahoo. My bad. I blame society.

• Apart from my niece and nephew, nothing is more disappointing to me than raisins in carrot cake.