‘Til Death. Or Whatever Works For Ya.

Whenever a dude proposes to a woman, I feel like he’s saying, “Hey – I’ll bet you half my shit I’ll never cheat on you.”

I probably shouldn’t mention that next week, when I’ll be a groomsman in a wedding, but I make no promises.

This week, the longest marriage in Hollywood came to an end, when Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman broke up after 30 years because Danny couldn’t keep his tiny peep in his pants. It’s actually just in time for the newest Hollywood marriage, between two of my best friends, Bru and Aina, to begin. And I honestly think it’ll last.

Now I’m not saying they have to top 30 years. For now, we’ll set the bar low – Tom Cruise – and go from there.