Once Again, Out-Of-Context Thank-You Notes I’ve Recently Written To Casting Directors.

• It was interesting doing a scene about a guy who gets beat up by a gay football player. Or as I like to call it: my high school years.
• I’ve never sat in a police captain’s chair. But the back of a squad car? Why yes.
• I’d work with JB Smoove for free, only my agent’s not fond of collecting 10% of that.
• Acting is my profession, but “rich prick who gets away with everything” seems like a kickass hobby.
• I’m not crazy – my mother had me tested.
• I think I’d be immune to snake venom in my coffee, seeing as I normally add something far more lethal: Hazelnut Coffee Mate.