People Who Got Their Asses Kicked By Me In Words With Friends.

There's nothing like the promise of a fully-charged phone. It allows you to use your head – and smack some heads around – with a rousing game of the Scrabble-ripoff Words With Friends.

Granted, I’ve been systematically getting my own ass kicked by one opponent in particular (curse you, woman), but I’ve really got the number of a few folks myself:

I was particularly proud when I slid the word “LOVERS” into the bottom middle of this one, blowing the game wide open. My opponent was my friend Brian, and he had cause for consternation because he works as a copy editor.

Apparently the “C” in CStephen stands for “Coward,” as this chap forfeited before I could finish pummeling him.

AJewell is sound, sorted, prudent, methodical…. I'm sorry. I was told there would be a game.

AJewell also had a surprising reserve of orneriness. But challenge me to a rematch, open up with “GAIN” and within four or five Mississippis you’re at risk of your masculinity.