America’s got the best government on the planet. Where else can a young black man work really, really hard so that someday he might grow up to be compared to Hitler?Even on the local level here in Cali, the system works. After the Easterquake earlier this month, Assemblyman Ted W. Lieu sent out a handy brochure to help keep his constituents prepared for the big one. And if Teddy Politics cares this much about enlightening me, who I am I not to peruse this thing?
California’s Earthquake Preparedness Guide is chock full of super handy tips, like keeping extra medicine and pet food around, plus available cash. (Though personally, I’m going to use the opportunity to riot and shoplift Paul’s TV – The King of Big Screen.)
Also, this gem: “List three places where family members should plan to go if they cannot stay in or return to home.” Here’s my three: 1) Somewhere in the Pacific Ocean. 2) The rubble my leg will be pinned under. 3) Ted W. Lieu’s house – he’s got available cash.
Thanks, Ted Dubya. If my district survives Armageddon, come November, I’m voting for you at least twice.
