My craft is your crutch. Presenting a simple course in how to lie.In a word: specificity.
Calling in sick? First create in your mind a very real history. Were you up all night? What are your symptoms? What did the doctor prescribe? The more details, the more believable mannerisms and tone. Got it? Now make that call– the Yanks are playing a matinee.
Went out with the boys, but told your wife you had to work late? Again, apply Matt's Method®. But if you come home covered in stripper glitter, you're on your own.
Cop pull you over? Try specificity with a generous helping of embarassment: "Officer I know I was doing 78 in a 40, but I just t0tally sharted myself." No traffic school for you, chico.
Thus ends today's lesson. Get out there and perjure yourself.
