The Getty Villa: An iPhone™ Photo Gallery.

J. Paul Getty’s key to success: “Rise early, work hard, strike oil.”

Thanks, douche. Nonetheless, the man loved his ancient Italian art collection, and really wanted to share it with the public. It’s housed in a perfect setting in Malibu, and my mom was in town, so we spent the afternoon there. Some thoughts:

Back in 200 BC, I wonder if Byzantine chanting monks got laid like One Direction.

Arguably my favorite relic of all.

Encouraging my nephew to perform his first photo bomb.

In the family area, kids can hold a hard-foam sword and have their shadow image projected. Here, my nephew swung at his mom and connected so loud, a guard took the sword away from him.

The local drought has become so serious, all fountains on the premises were dry. I’m guessing by October we’ll be drinking our own urine.