Last Week In @mattshevin Tweets.

• Fine, Navy Seals – we finally forgive you for that movie about you starring Charlie Sheen.
• I just realized I inadvertently shoplifted my new contacts after my optometrist didn’t charge me. #jewonjewcrime
• Not sure if a tweet is an admissible alibi in court, but I’m officially putting it out there: I just walked into that ladies room by mistake.
• Thrilled to meet Malcolm-Jamal Warner. Disappointed he wasn't with Cockroach.
• Put on a wedding ring for a commercial today. Finger did not burst into flames. #sighofrelief
• My tweet about stealing contact lenses prompted another optometrist office to start following me on here. #stealingsunglassesfromthem