Thursday, April 28, 2016
The result: the coolest bowling alley in the country.
It re-opens tomorrow night, with its original name: Highland Park Bowl. The menu includes Neopolitan pizzas and classic cocktails. Next year, they’re adding a microbrewery. But just check out the renovation. It’s mind-blowing. Who wants to leave the Matrix?
Wednesday, April 27, 2016
She gets me. And when she asked me for help applying for the drama program at her school, I figured I owed her. The program has incredibly stringent standards, so twice I made her rewrite the section of the application that asked her why she wanted to act.
She got in. I’m almost as excited as she is.
My niece is at a tricky age (she turns twelve next week), trying to figure out what she’s into and how she fits in. Twelve-year-olds can be even more critical of themselves than their peers. One minute she’s a child, and the next a would-be teen. I’m glad that she found something she likes and had to earn her way in.
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
But Amy Poehler can chime in any time. I’m nearing the end of her book, Yes Please, and it’s easily one of the best books about having a career in show business. Here’s a passage I really like:
I once was having dinner with an old friend when I was on “SNL”. Baby Mama was coming out and I was in the middle of one of those weird press pushes where your face is on taxis and you’re doing talk shows all the time. My friend went on and on about how weird that was, and asked me if I “could believe it.” “Yes,” I said. I had worked for over a decade to get to this moment. “Can you?” I asked him.
But I was lucky. Your career and your passion don’t always match up. Plenty of talented people don’t have the careers they want. Plenty of untalented people make millions and make movies. Hard work doesn’t always matter. You can be the best at making contacts and going after jobs, but then suddenly you want it too much, and everybody feels how bad you want it and they don’t want to give it to you. Even at six years old, my son is learning to stop paying attention to the toy he wants. He knows that if he lets on how bad he wants it, his four-year-old brother will snatch that shizz up in a hot second. Pretending not to want something can work.
The Buddhists call this healthy detachment. Too often we are told to visualize what we want, and cut out pictures of it to create vision boards, and repeat it like a mantra. Positive affirmations are written on our tea bags. I am introducing a new idea: try to care less. Practice ambivalence. Learn to let go of wanting it. Treat your career like a bad boyfriend.
Here’s the thing: your career won’t take care of you. It won’t call you back or introduce you to your parents. Your career will openly flirt with other people while you are around. It will forget your birthday and wreck your car. It will blow you off it you call it too much, and it’s never going to leave its wife. Your career is banging other people and everyone knows but you.
But let me make a distinction between career and creativity. Creativity is connected to your passion, that light inside that drives you. That joy that comes when you do something you love. That voice that tells you, “I like this. Do this again. You are good at it. Keep going.” Your creativity is not a bad boyfriend. It is a really warm, older Hispanic lady who has a beautiful laugh and loves to huge. If you are even a little bit nice to her, she will make you feel make you feel great and maybe cook you delicious food.
Monday, April 25, 2016
Saturday, April 23, 2016
Friday, April 22, 2016
Thursday, April 21, 2016
Wednesday, April 20, 2016
Mainly because people wigged over this SNL sketch from Saturday night:
After it aired, a petition was posted on change.org, calling the sketch “tasteless, cruel and heartless”, and that it poked fun of a very real and deadly drug epidemic in America right now. The petition demands SNL apologize. 8600 people have signed it.
8600 people need to learn the definition of satire. The sketch is satirizing our medicated culture – not so much heroin, but over-the-counter drugs.
Great comedy pushes boundaries. Thank God SNL has been going back to its roots this year, with some darker humor. I was talking with my friend Chad yesterday about the sitcom we’re writing, and we both refuse (or really, don’t know how) to do safe comedy. Want us to write a show you can watch with your kids? Hard pass.
But go right ahead, all 8600 of you – sign away your freedom. You all sound like a delight.
Tuesday, April 19, 2016
Both are in the wheelhouse of my friend John Kapelos, who’s been killed in a whole lot of movies and TV shows, including “Justified”, and by my own hands in my movie The Beneficiary.
As for comedy, John, who came up in Second City, is hall-of-fame talented. He’s now started a podcast that harkens back to the glory days of Second City, loaded with sketches and jokes and characters voiced by John. Wait’ll you hear his production skills. You may want to pop an Ambien.
Check it out here, download it at iTunes, thank me later.
Monday, April 18, 2016
Saturday, April 16, 2016
Friday, April 15, 2016
Tuesday, April 12, 2016
Monday, April 11, 2016
Until then, I’ll video my own life, one second per day. Click below for the month of March.
Side note: while I usually chose throwback tunes for these, I went with the current hit “My House”, by Flo Rida, which I loved cranking as I walked around New York.) Put in your earbuds and turn it way up:
Saturday, April 9, 2016
Friday, April 8, 2016
Thursday, April 7, 2016
Wednesday, April 6, 2016
The Yanks are my spirit animal. And since opening day happened to fall yesterday while I was in New York, I got a boner, and then a kickass seat to the game.
Tuesday, April 5, 2016
That day happened yesterday here in New York, killing the ability to do anything outside.
I was cheered-up though by the ingenuity of the city worker who used a discarded plastic bag to keep his dreads dry. Like a boss.
We try again today.
Monday, April 4, 2016
I had a free day yesterday, so I took the train out to see my mom. She was showing a house in the afternoon, so Ollie Shevin and I got in an extended nap.
It was nice to get out. Freezing cold, with frost on the ground, but my mom and I had a nice dinner before I took nap #2 and came back into the city.
Extra kickass schedule today, which I can’t wait to blog out. See you tomorrow.
Saturday, April 2, 2016
It NEVER stops raining here. So naturally, JFK Airport had to shut down temporarily last night when it became torrential, and my plane wasn’t allowed to land. We were diverted for three hours to Stewart Airport in Newburg, NY.
Stewart is so small, TSA goes home at 5 p.m., so we sat on the runway and were told that if we got off the plane, we wouldn’t be allowed back on. Some passengers panicked and got off , trying to Uber it to Manhattan. The rest of us mingled in an awkward cocktail party.
JetBlue was as accommodating as it could be. They even emailed us, apologizing, and offered a discount on our next flight, even though it wasn’t their fault. But my favorite thing was when a dog on the plane needed to be walked, but its owner wasn’t allowed to leave, So the pilot took the dog out for a walk.
That’s JetBlue. My airline.
Friday, April 1, 2016
Flying JetBlue, however, is a dream, with all the free snacks and drinks you want in a nifty cooler in the middle of the plane.
Flying United is like flying a drunk goose.
Flying JetBlue is comfy, with big, leather seats and free WiFi.
WiFi is $31 on United.
Flying United is like living downstairs at Downton Abbey.
JetBlue somehow figured out a way to make going through TSA at their terminals super fast.
Flying United out of JFK is like 311’s music built a terminal and also ran an airline.
I’m on a JetBlue flight this morning. Thank Jesus.